Once upon a time, I was falling in love
But now, I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart

Once upon a time, there was light in my life
But now, there's only love in the dark
There's nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart

I am always in the dark..

♥ PROFILE

hest borned on 07.04.xxxx, crazily in love with maths and dogs. is labelled nerdy and hardworking need of frens =D totally treasure them.

♥ DESIRES
.gd grades. .gd frens around me. .doggie. .your love.

♥ LEAVE ME A TAG

♥ FRIENDS

.0.5 bizarre.
.1cheesecake.2complicated.
.3/4absolutezero.
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ARCHIVES;

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Sunday, April 30, 2006
4/30/2006 08:30:00 pm

FROGS

hahs...i m like my fanfic fan hahs...she is very cute and she has a dog and she likes the song bu xiang zhang da hahs...she is really cool and she is pretty too hahs...gosh i sounded like i m in love with her...

anyway you noe wat...my house have TWO big frogs and omg i m so darn scared of them and can you believe it, heyden actually love them and was so interested in them and even touched them omg omg omg i dun even dare to look at them their eyes are so big and their skin looks so slimy and it really juz erks me...omg...haiz...i dun even dare to go near it...and he actually touched it...ewwww....

class tee gt quite a lot of prob but still i believe we can overcome it with 2b's class spirit.

2B WAN SUI!!!

2B ROX!!!

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Thursday, April 27, 2006
4/27/2006 07:29:00 pm

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GERI!!! muackz you are fourteen now!

hahs...yea today is geri's birthday...hope she will like the present i gave her. shhh...dun tell you all wat is it =P

yesterday was the debates briefing at RJC...omg i suddenly kinda regreted getting into IP cuz i juz love RJC haiz...with all the greens...staircases...corridors...windows...big big one mind you...den all the corridor the same one hahs i almost gt lost...den the ppl there are so nice the teacher look nice...i feel inspirated to do debates...hahs and i will definitely work to my limit cuz i realise that we RV-ians are at the losing end...we dun have a debates teacher well if ms choong is not counted...we are not that exposed to debates and we are really NOOBS there...omg...to think that i din even understood the motion that they given us for the practise. it was THIS HOUSE WOULD HOLD COMPANIES RESPONSIBLE FOR VOLUME OF POLLUTION...it is so direct yet my brian izzt working at all...well at least i learnt sth there...

haiz...ppl change fast...i hope hope hope she is really saying the truth and that she is not changing at all...and if she ever changes it is cuz of peer influence nth else...i dun want to do with another mask person...haiz...it is really getting on my nerve how ppl are...they are COMPLICATED!!! AAAHHH!!!

oh yea...and guess wat i found, FINALLY!!! a fan of mine...and she is really sweet hahs...she is younger than me, live in england and yet still think my story was nice...my very first fan...i was so touched...yeah maybe i SHOULD continue writing...

i also gt very interested in lit now with macbeth going on...looking forward to every lit lsn...it is so interesting and really interesting? hahs

still very scared of the debates...muz realy wish us luck=/

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Tuesday, April 25, 2006
4/25/2006 06:33:00 pm

my thoughts

i think i have really found two frens who have the same passion and interest as me. though we are of different heights and different character, we are at the same growth stage and i really really really feel very very comfortable with them around...we can go shopping and den come back with the same things (i hope! hahs) well...yea the things that we like are almost the same and our thinking are alike too...which make it so rare and...comforting...and nice! i really enjoy being with them...i love them!! =)

oh yea and den hor...he sms-ed den he called...i miss him all over again...i was getting over him and den he came back...juz to find out how i m now...well i was happy at first den i started thinking...did he do all those to make me feel miserable? well when was he ever good...haiz...but still i m very very very glad that he did these...at least i noe he still rmb-ed my no...hahs...yeah...i realise why i loved him so much before...well it is cuz he is not sarcastic and treats me really well...and he is so darn sweet...i could bite him off hahs...yeah...gosh i m not helping myself forgetting him at all...haiz...

yeah den i think all the guys i meet flirts you noe well tell me which guy don't flirt? haiz...he just omg...one time can like so many ppl. after knowing this i really felt disgusted...how can? tell me, how can you ever do that? haiz...still feeling disgusted...he is still over his heels with a gal and he sae that. who can ever be so disgusting? omg omg omg i juz HATE him. he is a JERK!

oh yeah, then there is this debates, we are going to have a briefing tmr...haiz...feeling so sad can't go out with her to get persent for her. haiz...it has been long since i went out with her...haiz...but still i think EL RAWKZ!!! =P i dun really know if i can speak well enough to go out there and debates. as you all know my english speaking SUX!!! so how can i even put my points across clearly? haiz...better wish me good luck!

den today CID...omg i was so darn embarrassed...i noe it is good that a teacher praises you but den in front of so many ppl want me to stand up and sae how we do things...it is like boasting yourself out to everyone else...haiz...i really really really feel very bad. wat if they treat me as enemies now? it is really not my fault for doing it so quickly...we started writing the report from the very start actually...it is really not my fault...haiz...i wonder when i will den clear this big big big big big big big big big big big...etc. cloud above my head and live under the clear sky...haiz...

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Friday, April 21, 2006
4/21/2006 11:07:00 pm

SGEM

i dun think i have talked about SGEM yet in my blog...or have i? aiyah anyway even if i have talked about it i will still talk about it now...ms bose and mrs kan both sae that we did a very good job, some teachers also sae that way too...well other then me dropping the jug...everything should be alright...haiz...that was really a very careless mistake. i m very very very happy that the teachers praise the script...man i was so happy! hahs...but to tell you the truth, we (me, grace, ariel and jose) din really think that the play was that well done cuz as ariel had said this whole play, anyone with a script can easily act it out...the main thing is that those actor and actresses din have the mood in the play...they were juz rushing through the lines and all that...though we were glad that it was over we were quite upset and think that we can do better...like the bad backstage crew...haiz...juz by thinking it i can imagine how embarrassed i m...i was the BLUR SOTONG! haiz...

but still congratulate the sec ones cuz they did their best i noe that...and good effort we all appreaciated it.

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Saturday, April 15, 2006
4/15/2006 08:55:00 am

the longest period i have ever slept

whoa i can't believe it. i actually slept for er...14.5h omg...hahs ok let me start from er... thursday.

my adventure started on thurs, after cca, i went home rather early as compared to the past days. i went home, bathed, and slept after eating. den woke up at nine plus pm for piano. did VERY badly for it..haiz...cuz i still in dreamland hahs. den at about 11++pm we (my family) went to sembawang park for CAMPING!!! whoa my goodness the view there is juz FANTASTIC! really the place to relax. let me try to describe...our camping site is under five coconut trees facing the beach juz at the waveline. omg when it was high tide the wave was juz next to our feet. god....this was so heavenly...hahs...played soccer with my cousins (three of us only) well...they taught me how to...yup...den i went to bed in the i-build-tent! hahs..at about 2. den my cousins went to catch crabs, without me boohoohoo...esp when the crabs are flower crabs...boohoohoo...yup...my day past.
fri, woke up early, but still missed the sunrise. had a very wonderful slp. wanted to go and eat breakfast den go to school...hopefully to help the om-s. but! we went to dunno-where to eat roti prata. hahs. the prata is SMALL!!! den after that guess where we went. we went to the TREETOP WALK!!! we went there without any plans so all of us, after returning from the beach was in slippers. haiz...though it was a very nice walk and a close contact with the nature..but...there are many many things i would like to 'complain'.

1. it was raining
2. i was wearing slippers
3. it was a 7km walk
4. the treetop walk was tall and unstable
5. the other ppl was shaking the treetop walk
6. i was wearing shorts, feeding all the mosquitoes
7. we had to walk a long way before reaching the treetop walk

haiz...i think that is all...try linking them all together...it was raining and i was walking a 7km walk in slippers till the treetop walk and yet the tree time walk was tall and unstable with ppl shaking. whoa and as you all noe i m scared of heights. juz imagine...i was walking...clutching on to the side rails...with an umbrella in one hand and my fone in another...juz imagine if either one of them drop...haiz...but i was still drenched.

after that we went to eat, at jurong under my uncle's house...with all of us 'dying'. i was so hungry that i ate my mum's rice too...looks like the prata weren't enough. den we went home, i bathed, and drop onto my bed (3pm) and started snoring (like i snore like that hahs) well i set my alarm at 4.30pm, but when i woke up, it was 10pm!!! omg omg omg i actually couldn't wake up to my hp alarm! big news!!! hahs...yea i woke up juz in time for da chang jing, den after that i went back to slp till 7.30am this morn...big slp so now very fresh! hahs nice slp =)


today is om liao...i wonder how charm they all do...juz finish my cid...cid...hope we are doing alright...den haiz...good luck to the om people...really hope they will win...they put in quite a lot of effort...

=) hwk time

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Wednesday, April 12, 2006
4/12/2006 08:20:00 pm

feel that i have really let myself down

yea...i really feel that i have let myself down...my exams...they are...there is only one word to describe and that is BAD!!! haiz...it is the first time i gt a result as bad as 25.5/50. i cannot stand it. i think this is wat i will normally gt. this is my capability. if i din study. :'( cried almost the whole day...eyes felt very sore..my heart feels very pain...wat m i suppose to do to improve myself. i think that i did very badly cuz...if the teachers taught us like that, then we should have the capability to do the test paper they set for us, so this means that I m not up to their expectation yet...what should i do to improve? maybe i should study harder...this is a big fall...let's hope i can climb back up...wish me good luck...

:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Monday, April 10, 2006
4/10/2006 08:49:00 pm

quiz :)

yupps. charlene i din forgt to do this though it is a bit late but now den i gt time ma =)

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page18 and find line four:-
"I told you already," the curator stammered, kneeling defenceless on the follr of the gallery.

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can:-
AIR! =P

3. What is that last thing you watched on TV:-
wait...let me think...i think should be One Piece

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:-
9.30pm

5.Now look at the clock. What is the actual time:-
10.10pm (if i din read the watch wronly)

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear:-
sound from the natural awww...i m so close to nature

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing:-
just? er...when i went to eat my dinner?

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at:-
i was reading jess's blog and den reading my sms-es...

9. What are you wearing:-
hmmm...you really want me to describe? er...pokemon green shirt with pikachu in the middle and a dark blue flory pants XD

10. Did you dream last night:-
oh gawwd...it is really scary lor...i dreamt that there were vampires in my house and den we nid to try to kill them with our (me and my mum) bare hands...den it is all so bloody and bloody!!!

11. When did you last laugh:-
think should be when i m doing CID that time with ariel

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in:-
window...shelves...books...DUST!

13. Seen anything weird lately:-
everyone i meet is weird so...seen lots of them...

14. What do you think of this quiz:-
ok lah i like the dream ques XD

15. What is the last film you saw:-
hmm...quite long din watch show le... should be that time watch in class the day after tmr ba...

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy:-
i wanna buy a new bed and slp in it for about a week before waking up and doing my stuff again! XD nice dream ah...

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:-
i love you? hahs aww...=P

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you change:-
i want this world to be less unfair more justice. i juz want a fair world where everyone will be treated equally and that no one will have an advantage juz because of one more piece of paper!

19. Do you like to dance:-
depending on wat dance...but generally...no.

20. George W Bush:-
yea so? wat about him?

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what will you call her:-
hmmm...sth starting with 'K' i love names with 'K'!

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what will you call him:-
maybe...er...sth special and...i dun think so far =)

23. Have you ever considered living abroad:-
yea...maybe somewhere like Edinburgh? but singapore is still the BEST!

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates:-
You have been a good person, keep it up i will protect you forever! X)

25. 4 people who must do this in their journal:-
hehe...let's see...i want ARIEL...CHARMAINE...GRACE...last but no least...hmm...difficult choice...let's see...hmmm...HAIWEI!!! yahoo! hehe i juz sabo four ppl! wheepee!

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Saturday, April 08, 2006
4/08/2006 10:31:00 pm

i have been through this...

yeah...i have been through this...i noe wat is going on...i understand wat is going on...yet i still felt jealous...jealous cuz she chose her lover instead of her fren...i have been through this juz that now i m in the fren's stand...i finally understand how ayesha felt...i feel very guilty now. maybe i was wrong in the first place and den put the blame on her. but that is the past now. i felt jealous...i felt so out...so...extra...i dun understand wat was going on and i hate that feeling. i dunno wat to do except to juz go along with them...maybe...i can study now. juz focus on my studies and nth else...yea...maybe i should...

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Friday, April 07, 2006
4/07/2006 09:28:00 pm

my BIRTHDAY!!!

(sigh) i m fourteen now. =) a year older.

i received TEN presents today, feeling very touched and happy and i can feel the warmth that is given to me by my frens...i love all of you! hahs i m really really very glad. it doesn't matter if the present was big or small, it is the thoughts that counts. yeah today i grin from ear to ear all day like the time in pri six when mrs low suddenly said to sing me a birthday song. hahs i still rmb that time...i was so embarrassed yet i felt so glad that the teacher rmb-ed my birthday...

to me, birthday-s are impt events, and...i really enjoyed every year's birthday.

P.S. love all of your presents ty! <3

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Thursday, April 06, 2006
4/06/2006 08:38:00 pm

busybody

know the feeling of being unappreaciated, realise i m realy too free, learnt not to be a busybody now. i shouldn't have cared about them unless been asked to help. i regret. but no point cuz i volunteered. realise i m reallly very stupid. gt myself entangled into sth so complicated yet not appreciated. cried. felt sad. can do nth. just that learnt sth.

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Tuesday, April 04, 2006
4/04/2006 08:44:00 pm

haiz...my bad habits...

haiz...dunno what to do...like wat ariel said, i feel this is really a big prob...i really really really wanna apologise to those whom i have offended...today during cca...my tone and words used are inappropriate...and pls dun misunderstand me...i really really very sorrie...

i really dunno what to do with my tone and pitch when i m sort of in charge...ariel, jose and grace all think this is my character...but no matter wat i MUZ change or else howm i going to lead in the future...not that i will or not...but i really dun want unwanted enemies...i dun want ppl to misunderstand me...haiz...this is a prob...ariel suggested thinking before what i sae...cuz she sae that this is my implusiveness and i m suppose to be using my HOM of ability to control implusivenes...haiz...haiz...haiz...wat i going to do...

if i really offend you in the future pls do not take it to hert cuz i really dun mean it...it juz cuz i din think before i talk so you MUZ remind me hor...ty...

expressing the emptiness inside me..

Saturday, April 01, 2006
4/01/2006 09:26:00 pm

A COMP-LESS DAY!!!

haiz...yuppx so in the end i din go for the sc interview. i m feel really sorrie if i have let you down or what-so-ever, but yea i made up my mind and i din go for the interview, cuz of a reason my father said and that is, since i have already make up my mind not to be sc, so wat for waste everyone's time and go to the interview. i can let the chance to other ppl who are interested. den after that jj called...saying i was stupid...well i m not stupid...i just dun want to waste everyone's time. and sth that he said really... is true...i mean i did really wanted to be a sc last year...i wanted to be and yet now i have another chance but i just give it away...for friends and classes and ending up maybe offending many teachers and students. i dunno if wat i did is the correct thing or what, but i think that i have been giving up too many oppotunities of achieving my dreams, for friends and studies. there was another time when i was given the chance to rear a dog. it was during my pri school year. a cute doggie only at 50 dollars, even my dad agrees on it, but cuz of my studies, i gave up that chance. and now this sc thingy. i think i m really stupid lah...maybe i really m...

today in the morn on the comp, den realise comp cannot be on cuz the configuration system is all gone and den my c drive gt prob...so all my documents in there is GONE!!! can you believe it? it is GONE!!! haiz...so now i m still retyping my el script den muz wait till my father settle my new CPU den i can go on messenger...haiz...boohoohoo...every single thing there is gone...boohoohoo...haiz...so now i m at my dad's comp writing these...after writing halfway my script...boohoohoo...so today is not a really nice day...after all...

...pray hard i din ruin my life...

expressing the emptiness inside me..