yea...i really feel that i have let myself down...my exams...they are...there is only one word to describe and that is
!!! haiz...it is the first time i gt a result as bad as 25.5/50. i cannot stand it. i think this is wat i will normally gt. this is my capability. if i din study. :'( cried almost the whole day...eyes felt very sore..my heart feels very pain...wat m i suppose to do to improve myself. i think that i did very badly cuz...if the teachers taught us like that, then we should have the capability to do the test paper they set for us, so this means that
m not up to their expectation yet...what should i do to improve? maybe i should study harder...this is a big fall...let's hope i can climb back up...wish me good luck...
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Monday, April 10, 2006
4/10/2006 08:49:00 pm
quiz :)
yupps. charlene i din forgt to do this though it is a bit late but now den i gt time ma =)
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page18 and find line four:-
"I told you already," the curator stammered, kneeling defenceless on the follr of the gallery.2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can:-
AIR! =P
3. What is that last thing you watched on TV:-
wait...let me think...i think should be One Piece
4. Without looking, guess what time it is:-
9.30pm
5.Now look at the clock. What is the actual time:-
10.10pm (if i din read the watch wronly)
6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear:-
sound from the
natural awww...i m so close to nature
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing:-
just? er...when i went to eat my dinner?
8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at:-
i was reading jess's blog and den reading my sms-es...
9. What are you wearing:-
hmmm...you really want me to describe? er...pokemon green shirt with pikachu in the middle and a dark blue flory pants XD
10. Did you dream last night:-
oh gawwd...it is really scary lor...i dreamt that there were vampires in my house and den we nid to try to kill them with our (me and my mum) bare hands...den it is all so bloody and
bloody!!!11. When did you last laugh:-
think should be when i m doing CID that time with ariel
12. What is on the walls of the room you are in:-
window...shelves...books...DUST!
13. Seen anything weird lately:-
everyone i meet is weird so...seen lots of them...
14. What do you think of this quiz:-
ok lah i like the dream ques XD
15. What is the last film you saw:-
hmm...quite long din watch show le... should be that time watch in class the day after tmr ba...
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy:-
i wanna buy a new bed and slp in it for about a week before waking up and doing my stuff again! XD nice dream ah...
17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:-
i love you? hahs aww...=P
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you change:-
i want this world to be less unfair more justice. i juz want a fair world where everyone will be treated equally and that no one will have an advantage juz because of one more piece of
paper!
19. Do you like to dance:-
depending on wat dance...but generally...no.
20. George W Bush:-
yea so? wat about him?
21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what will you call her:-
hmmm...sth starting with 'K' i love names with 'K'!
22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what will you call him:-
maybe...er...sth special and...i dun think so far =)
23. Have you ever considered living abroad:-
yea...maybe somewhere like Edinburgh? but singapore is still the BEST!
24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates:-
You have been a good person, keep it up i will protect you forever! X)
25. 4 people who must do this in their journal:-
hehe...let's see...i want ARIEL...CHARMAINE...GRACE...last but no least...hmm...difficult choice...let's see...hmmm...HAIWEI!!! yahoo! hehe i juz sabo
four ppl! wheepee!
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Saturday, April 08, 2006
4/08/2006 10:31:00 pm
i have been through this...
yeah...i have been through this...i noe wat is going on...i understand wat is going on...yet i still felt jealous...jealous cuz she chose her lover instead of her fren...i have been through this juz that now i m in the fren's stand...i finally understand how ayesha felt...i feel very guilty now. maybe i was wrong in the first place and den put the blame on her. but that is the past now. i felt jealous...i felt so out...so...extra...i dun understand wat was going on and i hate that feeling. i dunno wat to do except to juz go along with them...maybe...i can study now. juz focus on my studies and nth else...yea...maybe i should...
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Friday, April 07, 2006
4/07/2006 09:28:00 pm
my BIRTHDAY!!!
(sigh) i m fourteen now. =) a year older.
i received TEN presents today, feeling very touched and happy and i can feel the warmth that is given to me by my frens...i love all of you! hahs i m really really very glad. it doesn't matter if the present was big or small, it is the thoughts that counts. yeah today i grin from ear to ear all day like the time in pri six when mrs low suddenly said to sing me a birthday song. hahs i still rmb that time...i was so embarrassed yet i felt so glad that the teacher rmb-ed my birthday...
to me, birthday-s are impt events, and...i really enjoyed every year's birthday.
P.S. love all of your presents ty! <3
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Thursday, April 06, 2006
4/06/2006 08:38:00 pm
busybody
know the feeling of being unappreaciated, realise i m realy too free, learnt not to be a busybody now. i shouldn't have cared about them unless been asked to help. i regret. but no point cuz i volunteered. realise i m reallly very stupid. gt myself entangled into sth so complicated yet not appreciated. cried. felt sad. can do nth. just that learnt sth.
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
4/04/2006 08:44:00 pm
haiz...my bad habits...
haiz...dunno what to do...like wat ariel said, i feel this is really a big prob...i really really really wanna apologise to those whom i have offended...today during cca...my tone and words used are inappropriate...and pls dun misunderstand me...i really really very sorrie...
i really dunno what to do with my tone and pitch when i m sort of in charge...ariel, jose and grace all think this is my character...but no matter wat i MUZ change or else howm i going to lead in the future...not that i will or not...but i really dun want unwanted enemies...i dun want ppl to misunderstand me...haiz...this is a prob...ariel suggested thinking before what i sae...cuz she sae that this is my implusiveness and i m suppose to be using my HOM of ability to control implusivenes...haiz...haiz...haiz...wat i going to do...
if i really offend you in the future pls do not take it to hert cuz i really dun mean it...it juz cuz i din think before i talk so you MUZ remind me hor...ty...
expressing the emptiness inside me..
Saturday, April 01, 2006
4/01/2006 09:26:00 pm
A COMP-LESS DAY!!!
haiz...yuppx so in the end i din go for the sc interview. i m feel really sorrie if i have let you down or what-so-ever, but yea i made up my mind and i din go for the interview, cuz of a reason my father said and that is, since i have already make up my mind not to be sc, so wat for waste everyone's time and go to the interview. i can let the chance to other ppl who are interested. den after that jj called...saying i was stupid...well i m not stupid...i just dun want to waste everyone's time. and sth that he said really... is true...i mean i did really wanted to be a sc last year...i wanted to be and yet now i have another chance but i just give it away...for friends and classes and ending up maybe offending many teachers and students. i dunno if wat i did is the correct thing or what, but i think that i have been giving up too many oppotunities of achieving my dreams, for friends and studies. there was another time when i was given the chance to rear a dog. it was during my pri school year. a cute doggie only at 50 dollars, even my dad agrees on it, but cuz of my studies, i gave up that chance. and now this sc thingy. i think i m really stupid lah...maybe i really m...
today in the morn on the comp, den realise comp cannot be on cuz the configuration system is all gone and den my c drive gt prob...so all my documents in there is
GONE!!! can you believe it? it is
GONE!!! haiz...so now i m still retyping my el script den muz wait till my father settle my new CPU den i can go on messenger...haiz...boohoohoo...every single thing there is gone...boohoohoo...haiz...so now i m at my dad's comp writing these...after writing halfway my script...boohoohoo...so today is not a really nice day...after all...
...pray hard i din ruin my life...
expressing the emptiness inside me..